so let’s start with what NOT to do when you have herpes
1) don’t wait until after your intimate to share with your partner
2) don’t feel too ashamed that he’ll think of you differently if you do
3) don’t worry about the repercussions so much that you keep it to yourself
I’m not here looking for sympathy,comfort, support or anything good. I just hope I can help someone since I didn’t help the one man I came to love deeply.
We were 2 months into meeting and we had sex. I knew I should’ve told him long before and I knew he was beginning to feel strongly towards me b/c he told me so. We talked about everything under the sun and I had no reason to feel other than comfortable with him. We joked about how we were each others other half. I was the female version of himself and vice versa. Here we are 22 months later and even after I told him that dreadful news he some how managed to love me enough to stick it out. so much to the point of talking often of a future togther.
He continued to express his hurt that I caused but never let me feel worse about it. He was loving, supporting and everything I could ask for in a partner.
few months ago he went house shopping with me (I’m a single mom so this was huge deal) he helped me from the start to finish and was more excited than i was when i closed on my first house in my name.
You see my 10yr marriage ended few years ago and so i hadn’t been with any one til i met him and so the convo of herpes was never discussed. so i dint’ google or research on hows the best time or place to tell your partner. I just dint’ do my hW and now he’s had another breakout and not speaking to me.
when we last spoke he let me know that he had an outbreak and kept asking why did I not let him decide? why did i take away his choice to go forward with protection with me? why knowing how he felt about me did i cause him such permanent pain. On top of that he’s also diabetic and not all medicine work with him. So, its not a good picture at all.
at this point his last painful words to me were ‘there’s nothing left to say’ and so that’s where we left it. last thursday with those words. prior to that he was silent for a 1.5 weeks.
Again don’t judge me and i’m not here for comfort or support. i just hope that my experience can help someone make a wiser and better choice concerning the life of someone who I grew to love and care for like nobody else.