Help: My husband want to marry another wife after suffering with him for 17 years.

Updated on December 15, 2016 in Marriage Problems
11 on December 15, 2016

I made him what he is today, but now he wants to take another wife. What should I do?

Shalewa is not happy that after suffering with her husband, Ade, for 17 years and helping him to get where he is, he now wants to take another wife to go with his status.

She is angry that another woman would come in and benefit from her sweat but Ade is bent on getting married to the woman because of a chieftancy title his people gave him and tradition demands he should not marry only one wife.

Read her story here:

 

“My name is Shalewa, a 47-year-old married woman with three kids. At the moment, I am very angry with my husband, Ade, who, after 17 years of marriage, wants to get married to another woman.

We got married when Ade had nothing to call his own and I have suffered with him to build all that he has but he wants to pay me back with evil but I am not prepared to sit and watch another woman come in and benefit from my labour.

Ade was a struggling young man when we got married. As a quantity engineer, he was just managing to survive as contracts were not easy to come by.

 

I worked with a manufacturing company and did all I could to link him up with some of our customers and went out of my way to help him get to where he is now.

Our first breakthrough came when one of my bosses, a British man, got a big contract with the federal government and wanted someone to handle it for him.

I was very close to the white man and I pleaded with him to give my husband a chance and in the end, Ade got the contract even though renowned companies were interested and were ready to pay heavily to get it.

 

After successfully handling the job, my husband got more breakthroughs and within a short time, he had set up his own company, bought landed properties and went into the construction of housing projects.

His people in the village suddenly remembered him and chieftaincy titles came rolling in and last year, he was given one of the highest titles in his community.

 

In August of this year, Ade woke me up in the middle of the night and told me he was going to take another wife this December when he would be given another title. He said the title demands he takes a new wife and that plans have been concluded for the traditional marriage.

I thought he was joking but when I called his younger brother back home, he confirmed the development. I have fought Ade, quarreled with him, begged him, cajoled him, all in a bid to talk him out of the planned marriage but he is adamant and has told me that if I cannot cope with another woman in the house, I might as well leave.

Where do I start from? How would a man I did everything for suddenly want to repay my faithfulness and love with such a betrayal?

 

Shalewa.”

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0 on December 15, 2016

Men are not trustworthy, the best time to know a man’s true color is when he eventually have what he has been looking for. 

I will never help or believe any man….they are birds of same feathers.

There is no point in allowing this to happen…don’t allowing him to take a second wife

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This issue is very serious and so pathetic. How can a man be so forgetful or just chose to be wicked like that. Woman who suffered with you for 17 good years and now look at how you want to pay back. 

The woman should just take it easy and keep praying for God’s intervention. 

@finemonkey you are saying that because you are not a woman. always think deep before you comment

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0 on December 15, 2016

@Segzee look at your glass like ‘Awolowo’ own, do tie like Mr head-master. This forum is open to every to drop their commoents on every issue according to their view and understanding and not for someone to be criticizing other people’s comments.

Keep taking PANADOL on other people’s headache. 

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0 on December 15, 2016

This has happened to someone very close to my family before but thank God for the woman’s humility and patience. This woman’s took a new wife and decided to abandon her and her children even at their tender age. But the woman, being a hard working type faced her children, she did not allow a strange woman to drive her out. Today two out of her three children are graduates with the third one in university.

So, my advise for her is to exercise patience and pray for God’s wisdom to see her through.

@finemonkey and @Segzee u guys should behave now. We are here to make friends and help each other. 

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