Is he playing games with me?

Updated on October 12, 2016 in Singleness
0 on October 12, 2016


Last spring I ended a relationship with an emotionally abusive guy, I was so hurt was crying for hours every day. Then, I somehow met an old buddy, we were for the 1st time in the same city (both travelling). At first I wasn’t interested in him, didn’t even want to go out, but he insisted so much and had patience to try and try again. He was ok, not exactly my kind, but decent, polite… and very interested in me!!!

For half a year we’ve been talking only on social media, but religiously. He would ask me every morning how I was doing, and then a few times more during the day. We would share so much of our past and present. He wanted to know about my friends, my hobbies, my spiritual pursuit, job, hopes, dreams, everything. He even asked of my views on marriage and kids. My friends were impressed, too. He was really growing on me. Made plans to see each other again, showered me with honest compliments and thanked me for letting him into my life etc. A true dream!

Well… until the day we argued on political views. It’s strange, because we discussed such delicate topics and he viewed hings the same way… but this time, he didn’t want to hear my words, dismissed facts and sources, contradicted himself. The discussion was extremely frustrating, as he was no longer rational. He even boasted about knowing everything to perfection. I proved him with facts that he was wrong.


I can’t give up defending my views when I know I am right. I’m a perfectionist and only get in a fight when I am certain to be right. Also, can’t say I’m sorry if I haven’t wronged him. But now he acts all hurt and upset and said he had “issues with out debate”. He gave me the cold treatment for days and when I confronted him was calling me ‘angry’ although I was calm and reasonable. We argued again and said he wants to still wait it out and he doesn’t have enough time to give to this important matter right now. Even more days of silence.

I feel he’s playing the waiting game with me and possibly power games too. He admitted being a very proud guy. I absolutely hate this and I know he was vengeful with former girlfriends. We were supposed to meet in a few weeks, stay at his place, but I cancelled it all and didn’t tell him. What he did is pretty bad in my cards.

My friends insist I give him another chance but my trust is gone, I feel he can work his way to fool me again and then have revenge when I least expect it.

Am I exaggerating or is it a really risky situation? If we get to discuss matters, I might feel tempted to delete him and refuse to meet him even for a coffee. He said to me, “You’ll have to play by my rules and let me have some time for this” (lol, he’s not actually busy) to which I replied, “This is a pretty unfortunate choice of words”.JenniferCJ sour:

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