Things that could ruin or frustrate your Christmas celebration
1: Your ATM card gets stuck in the machine on Sunday (Christmas) morning.
Imagine running to the ATM machine to make withdrawal on Christmas morning with bae waiting in the car in anticipation of the Christmas outing, and after the 2nd trial, your card gets stuck- the most painful part will be if the girl is a new catch you were hopin to impress.
2: If your generator also decides to go on break.
You know na, for us that will have to spend Christmas at home, after loading your better pa my neighbour with fuel full tank and getting your best movie, generator now starts coughing. Then iya biliki your neighbour will na be like “ehya, your gen no work? And today na our off o” Chai!
3: When bae decides she has new plans for the day
You must have spent a week planning for Christmas with bae, curving all your side chicks just to savour Christmas together, then on Sunday morning bea calls and be like
“Hello boo, mummy says the house fellowship will hold in our parlour and I will take the praise and worship”
You’ll just be like “house fellowgini?, on Christmas day?”
4: ko si eran mo (no more meat)
This thing can pain o. When you buy turkey, live one o, for Christmas, that your guys are over.
You: mummy, awon ore mi nbo o, keep meet for them please
Mum: Haba, they’re always welcome. No problem
3 hrs later
You: mum, they’re here. Where did you keep the meat?
Mum: Haa! Ko maa si eran mo ke! No more meat o, the turkey shrink after I fried it.
5: The period
This is the baddest one. Just waking up and seeing your menses on Christmas day! You’ll be like ” no please, just one more day off”
Mood swing, hormones raging…worst of all, you leave bobo hanging in the cold (after taking alomo an tramadol) Kikikikikikiki
6: lol, this one makes me laugh – The Nigerian Tailor!
For those that are hoping on wearing a new tailor-made dress, and your tailor promises to get it ready on Christmas morning. Guess what? You get to her shop and alas! She hasn’t even cut the material – by 1pm. Lol.
7: Lagos traffic – human and vehicular.
OK, you kack up finish and head to the mall to spend your own money, your hard earned money o at the cinema. And you get there only to find a long queue. Jeez! Ok, lemme goan do shopping in the shoprite, Coman see crowd. This thing dampens my spirit so much.
8: Class Rep: “Lecturer says there’s a test on Saturday oo, attendance is 20 marks”
Shiit! This thing gives heart break to students. Imagine when you’ve planned to travel on Friday and lecturer na say there’s test… abeg make I fail am.
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